When I first attempted to introduce Gavin to a lovey, he was already quite old. Not surprisingly, he never took to it despite all our efforts to help him bond with a soft toy. Now why would I want my child to form an attachment to an inanimate object? Well, it is supposed to help them take those first steps towards “independence”. The presence of a lovey can help a child adjust to new situations without their parents – such as when Mummy and Daddy want to go out on a date.
Because Gavin was only ever attached to me, hubby and I were never able to go on a real date until I was already heavily pregnant with Gareth. Now that Gareth is around, I’m guessing it may be a while before we’ll get to go on another date – unless we can get Gareth comfortable enough with something or someone to stay home without Mummy and Daddy.
So here we are…
One of my friends mentioned that the reason why her son developed an attachment for a particular toy was because she always kept the toy around him almost from birth.
When Gareth was born, Gavin bought him a toy giraffe. Taking a leaf out of my friend’s book, I decided to let the giraffe sleep near Gareth so he can form an attachment to it. We’ll have to see if this works…
Just in case Gareth decides he has a preference, I’ve also started putting the stuffed elephant my BFF sent to Gareth for Christmas nearby.
In a few months time, we’ll be able to see if this tactic works… At any rate, Gareth seems quite comfortable with my MIL so hubby and I may just be able to go on a date sooner rather than later…
Does your child have a lovey? How did you introduce the lovey?
MieVee @ MummysReviews.com says
We tried introducing a lovey, from Sleepy Bear to mini comfort blanket to cloth teether. But baby has decided that Mummy is his one and only lovey. Hmm… No dating opportunity as yet. Good luck! 🙂
Shen-Li says
Yeah, hubby always joked that I was Gavin’s pacifier and lovey – hence the reason why we never got to go on a real date until I was almost about to deliver Gareth. Now hubby tells me I’d better let Gareth get used to my MIL so that we can start dating earlier. Hence the reason why I’m torturing myself to express milk because I seriously can’t be bothered otherwise.
My FIL was saying earlier that I should express the milk so that we can feed Gareth from the bottle when we go out. He is under the impression that it is easier to feed Gareth from the bottle while we are out compared to nursing directly. If only he knew how stressful it is to pump milk – at least for me it is. As it is, I barely sleep at night with Gareth and Gavin taking it in turns to keep me up. For me expressing at night is the easiest because my flow is best at that time. Unfortunately, it requires a lot of juggling between Gareth, Gavin and the breast pump. I have to make sure I express before Gareth and Gavin get on the breast because they’ll drain the all the easily expressed milk.
Lorry says
DD (15 months now) has never had a lovey but she’s never had any problems being cared for by others. My friend, who she’d only met a couple of times, babysat her long enough for a movie date and she was reportedly all smiles the whole time. She’s just a really laid-back kid, I think! I didn’t introduce a dummy until around four months, and she gave it up on her own by the time she was walking (10 months).
Shen-Li says
That’s great. I don’t know why Gavin was so resistant to being cared for by others. Then again, I was also hesitant to ask because I knew my ILs would get panicky if he lost it while I was out and couldn’t put them through it. I thought at the time that it would have helped if he had a lovey – it seemed to help our friend’s daughter.
I guess a lovey isn’t necessarily the only way to help a child adjust to the separation.
I have been very hesitant about introducing the pacifier because I know too many kids who have a lot of trouble kicking the habit. I was one of them so it runs a little too close to home for me to test it out on my kids :-p